http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog Every day entertainment for the everyday stiff. Thu, 11 Sep 2008 22:26:23 +0000 http://backend.userland.com/rss092 en http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/09/bye/ Will How about a women’s event that calls for each athlete to perform various sexual feats on me? As founder of the sport, I would naturally be judging the routines based on difficulty, form, and the extreme mental stamina necessary to control one’s laughter when I present my genitals. Otherwise I’d be ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/08/7-events-that-should-be-included-in-the-olympics/ Tom Okay, I’ll be first, then. My reason for not going to work is simple: Outside smells funny. Travis The reason you shouldn’t go to work tomorrow is simple: They don’t need you. Think about it. How many times have you gone on vacation and come back to loads of work sitting on your ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/08/6-reasons-you-shouldn%e2%80%99t-go-to-work-tomorrow/ Tristan Respect, love, or the ability to go outside without being laughed at. Then again, maybe that’s too absurd. We all know that nobody will ever love a cripple. Will Gary Coleman. Tom Either Machine Gun Leg, or Chainsaw Hand, ala Planet Terror and Army of Darkness, respectively. HP You guys aren’t putting too much effort into ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/08/7-best-replacements-for-amputated-limbs/ Tom: Sands of Time (Prince of Persia series) The Prince of Persia ability to change the flow of time around you with a magic sword. That was badass. Tom, how often do you need to change the time around you? Is your life really that death-defying? - Travis Travis, it’s not a matter ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/07/7-video-game-powerups-that-should-be-real/ HP “Oh hey guys, I’m alive.” I cannot stand it when a movie has the gall to kill off a major character (or a major characters loved one) only to puss out and bring the character back. I’m fine if it’s a decent twist and it feels like it was intended ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/07/7-movie-cop-outs-excluding-m-night-shyamalan/ HP I like apple pie, it’s pretty good. Tristan The best type of pie by far is the Whoopie Pie. Especially when you can get the perfect Whoopie to Pie ratio. I think I win this contest by sheer calorie count, because as everyone knows, the number of calories in anything is directly ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/07/7-decent-pies/ Tom: Omega Pirate (Metroid: Prime) I’m gonna throw down for the Omega Pirate, from Metroid: Prime. You came about halfway up his shin. He would stomp you, whack you around, and shoot radioactive lasers at you. When you shot him up and knocked some armor off, he’d go invisible and step ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/07/7-boss-righteous-boss-battles/ Now that you have your BA in Badassery from our accredited institution, set your sights on becoming as cool as these guys. Tom I guess I’ll start things off here…I’m going to throw down my vote for Tony Jaa, especially his character “Kham” from the movie The Protector. Kham has an elephant. ... http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/06/7-bad-ass-badasses/ Tristan Tucker HP Will Travis Jake Tom http://www.obscureinq.com/obscureblog/2008/06/6-best-ways-to-get-your-enemies-to-the-sun/