Hard Titting Journalism | 1 of 3
I would first like to note that I am honored to be part of Obscure Inq. I thought I would do something a little different than Travis and Tucker. I figure that instead of an interview featuring myself, I might interview others. This all started because of a particular question has been sticking with me.
“Who doesn’t like boobies?”
I could not think of a single person I know who has ever admitted to such a thing. Has anyone out on this great big world ever made such a claim? I wasn’t sure, so I set out to find the truth. I have a few hard hitting questions that I think bring light to this shadow of a pondering:
- Do you like breasts? (The answer doesn’t have to be just yes/no)
- What do you like about them (in 4 words or less)?
- What it your favorite slang for ‘breasts?’
I asked over 25 people those questions and got some very interesting results, which I shall show you in this 3 piece installment series. Please, read on.
Alright, Jason, here’s the first question: Do you like breasts?
Yes.
What do you like about them (4 words or less)?
They feel nice.
What it your favorite slang for ‘breasts?’
Boobs. That might be the easiest survey I had ever taken.
Haha, good job! Thank you!
You’re welcome sir.
Alright, Carl, here’s the first question: Do you like breasts?
Breast? I love ‘em! As a matter of fact I love ‘em so much I plan on growing my own!
What do you like about them (4 words or less)?
Words cannot describe.
What it your favorite slang for ‘breasts?’
Um… Fun Bags! Yeah, Funbags would have to be it.
Haha, awesome. Thanks!
Not a problem.
Do you like breasts, Kim?
Mine, sure.
In general?
They’re funny. I don’t love them though.
Haha. Okay. What do you like about them (in 4 words or less)?
Jiggle while you wiggle.
What it your favorite slang for ‘breasts?’
Fun bags.
I have with me Tom from ZeroSharedNickels.com. I am going to ask you a few questions, okay?
Gah. Fine!
Do you like breasts?
God………………….. what sort of answer is there besides “yes?” Yes, of course I like them.
Alright, excellent. What do you like about them (in 4 words or less)?
Fun to play with/look at.
Well, six words, sort of, but I’ll accept it. What it your favorite slang for ‘breasts?’
Hm… like, favorite to use? I’d say “boobies.” It’s fun to both hear and say.
Alright Great. Thanks!
Hi Ethan, can I ask you a few questions?
Why yes. Yes you can, my good man.
Ok. Do you like breasts?
If breasts were peanut butter sandwiches, then I would surround myself with them each and every day, licking the peanut butter and jelly out and spreading it all over everything I could get my hands on. But, because breasts aren’t peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, I just hope to see them all the time.
Disgusting.
You loved it.
What do you like most about breasts? (4 words or less)
The fact that there [sic] breasts. They’re squishy, warm, they have nipples, the make very good pillows, they look good in shirts, bras, and just bare. They’re fun to play with… oh, um, do symbols count as words?
Nope.
Score! breasts= x. y=warm, pillowie, sexiness. x=y^1000000000
I cannot fathom what that means, but wow.
Haha.
What is your favorite slang for breasts?
Probably titties, its just a fun word, it rolls of the tongue, but its got the harsh “T” sound. I feel it perfectly describes titties, the rolling off the tongue is the soft squishy part, and the “T” sound is the hard nipple.
Alright! Thanks!
Quickies
Genevieve
This may or may not be what you’re looking for but:
- I like breasts (mine and chicken breasts)
- chicken= healthy, protein, low-fat, tasty
- boobs
Sarah D.
- Sure Why Not
- Round And Curvy
- Fun Bags
Scott
- ahhhhh yessss. nuf said.
- Breasts are just cool.
- TA TAS
Jeff “The New Jersey Slide” B.
- fuck yea
- nipples in my mouth
- sweater potatoes
I want to thank everyone who participated for this interview! You guys are great. Join me next time for the next installment in Hard Titting Journalism! Until then, I’ll see you next time!
-HP-
I would like to be the first person who does not write for the Obscure Inq web ring to post a comment in Obscure Inq. Well, I didn’t so much intend to be the first to do this, it just turns out that after several weeks, no one else has done so. I mean, hell, even out of the people who write for the ring, only one person has commented, and then only once. I could do the math on how long it would take for Hp’s projected “thousands” of comments to accrue at the current rate they are being made, but being that he was probably so excited by seeing a comment that he is already engaged in post-ejaculatry weeping by now, I don’t want to worsen his already fragile emotional state with bleak projections.
Now, to the original comments I intended to note when making this post. Firstly, I resent not having been surveyed, and don’t give me that “not on AIM” crap, I know that there is at least one person surveyed who is almost never on AIM. Second, I feel that it should have been added that “titties” is not only Ethan’s favorite vernacular for “breasts,” but the phrase, “them’s some big titties” is among his most common statements. Finally, the statement was made about a week and a half ago that it should generally be safe for me to check Obscure Inq at work without much risk of my fellow teachers or any students noticing anything inappropriate. What do I get the first time I try to open in during a free minute in the classroom? “Hard Titting Journalism.” Thanks for that, thanks so much.
It is all HP’s fault.
Well, well, well Chaddy. Thank you for your comment, your opinion means something to someone.
We consider Obscure Inq to be SFW for the most part. Although filthy words may appear from time to time, unless someone is peering over your shoulder you should be fine. If I can write it at work, you can read it at work.
I apologize for not interviewing you, though not really. You are not an easy man to get a hold of. If you would like, you may add your two cents on another comment below.
Thank you for choosing Obscure Inq.
Office monkeys are subjected to less scrutiny at work. Also, you have no fewer than 6 different ways to contact me. Additionally, I’d like to note that I have sparked what is now a quintupling of your total comments. You’re welcome.